A physical means to an emotional end

This morning my patience was thin, I snapped at my boyfriend and moped around for about an hour. While angrily doing the dishes, I started to think about what it was that was really bothering me and there it was: work. Still on my mind from two days ago. I had no idea how it got so ingrained in my psyche that it was pissing me off when I didn't even know I was thinking about it.

So I brought it with me to yoga. In the 5 minutes before class that I usually spend trying to clear my mind and focus on my practice, I decided to focus on this perceived failure. To keep a clear focus on how it felt and why it felt that way.

When the instructor began class, she told us to set an intention for the class. I chose to keep focusing on my problem. And through every sun salutation, every forward bend I kept it in my mind. And every time my focus sharpened, there it was. It popped up while I was in warrior and I deepened my knee bend until my forward leg shook. It popped up during cosmic dancer and I kicked back into my hand harder.

By the end of class, as I laid back in shivasana, it was gone. I didn't work through any solutions, I just thought about it. Kept it in the front of my mind instead of letting it sink back down to the back where it could pop up out of nowhere. It was like I took my giant emotional issue and solved it physically - there on my mat. I sweated through it, not letting it evade me. Focused on the way I felt; the dissappointment, the regret until it seeped out through my postures and left my body. After class, walking towards Lakeshore to catch the bus, I swear I felt lighter.